'Twas just days before Christmas, the end of the year.
Poor Karen and Mark were in need of a
beer.
No stockings were hung, no gifts by
the tree,
No money was left to buy them, you
see.
The year started with promise, to
Disney they flew,
To escape the cold weather, and bouts
of the flu.
With Amanda not sleeping and Mark’s
wallet so tight,
Karen asked them to leave the very
first night.
For nineteen odd years we lived in a
place
With flowers and trees and acres of
space.
Our beautiful home, looked over a pond
Where turtles and egrets and herons
abound.
With Amanda in college and Naz far
away,
Ally’s drive was too long, over an
hour each day.
So we listed the house, put a sign in
the yard
Not guessing that moving would be so
damn hard.
After three failed attempts, the house
finally sold
To a couple of numbskulls, millennials
we’re told.
With prices so high, our choices were
few.
As closing approached, we knew not
what to do.
Our time had run out, mere weeks left
to spare.
We couldn’t be picky, our broker
despaired.
Though the house that we chose was
truly a wreck.
We signed on the line, and wrote-out
the check.
Mark filled up a folder with questions
and notes.
We sharpened our pencils, solicited
quotes.
It wasn’t so scary. How bad could it be?
They make it look easy on HGTV.
Out kitchens and bathrooms!
Out carpets and doors!
Gone lighting and fixtures!
Gone toilets and floors!
From the top of the roof
To the first level hall,
Now throw away!
Throw away!
Throw away all!
The list was too long, the destruction
too great
It seemed that we’d put far too much
on our plate.
With no place to go, and no way to
win,
To the rescue came Syl, who took us
all in.
On May 17, the moving trucks came
To pick up our stuff, in down pouring
rain.
We moved in with mom, invading her
space
Our parcels and bags all over the
place.
It wouldn’t be long, we said to
ourselves.
The work was cosmetic - cabinets,
counters, and shelves.
We figured we’d be there a month,
maybe two,
We’d hired what seemed like a
competent crew.
We visited often. The progress was slow.
Amanda was frantic, ready to blow.
Two months had gone by, with much left
to do.
The girls were not happy sharing a
room.
The adults were both wedged in too
small a bed.
Mark gave up on sleep, working
instead.
The pressure was mounting, oh when to
move in?
Syl’s once stoic patience began to
wear thin.
Our wits at the end, each losing their
cool,
Amanda so bummed, she stayed home from
school.
Karen postponed our move one last
time.
It was now late in August, the end of
the line.
We couldn’t move forward, we dared not
look back,
We had to do something to get back on
track.
So taking the matter into our own
hands
We picked up some brushes and opened
some cans.
No strangers to work, the whole family
pitched in.
Amanda took charge of painting the
trim.
Mark finished two rooms, including the
shed.
Karen and Ally assembled the beds.
After five brutal months, we were
finally in.
Syl said goodbye to her wayfaring kin.
The house was all shiny, pretty and
bright.
All slept rather well, that first
homey night.
We spent a small fortune, using one of
those cards
Which offer free miles, the more that
you charge.
With thousands of credits ready to
blow,
The world is our oyster, with nowhere
to go.
We somehow survived our summer from
hell,
Though Amanda still is not doing so
well.
Penniless, beaten, exhausted and
fazed,
We’ll always remember those
nightmarish days.
So hear this fair warning, before you
agree
To fix up a dump – you can take it
from me.
We were wrong to ignore that small
voice when it said,
“You’re better off renting a condo
instead!”
Merry Christmas to All, and to All Good
Grief,
